A Wife's Little Red Book: Common Sense, Wit, and Wisdom for a Better Marriage - Softcover

Robert Ackerman is a Professor of Sociology and Director of the Mid-Atlantic Addiction Training Institute (MAATI) at Indiana University of Pennsylvania (IUP) and a cofounder of the National Association for Children of Alcoholics (NACoA). Best known for writing the first book in the United States on children of alcoholics in 1978, Dr. Ackerman has become internationally known for his work with families and children of all ages, served on many advisory boards and worked with numerous government agencies and task forces. He is a veteran of numerous TV appearances and has been featured on CNN Headline News, the Today Show, and in USA Today newspaper and Newsweek Magazine.

When he's driving, let him pretend that he's not lost.

Let him enjoy the last two minutes of the game without interruption.

Leave him at least a small space in the shower to keep some of his things.

Don't talk about old boyfriends in front of him.

When you enter a party with him hold on to his arm.

Tell him about the meeting with the teacher who called, that the garbage disposal is broken, that the car insurance has been cancelled, and that your mother is coming to visit ― after dinner!

Make time for him.

Let him find out, by your actions, not your words, that he can count on you.

When he asks, 'What's wrong?' don't say, 'Nothing,' if there is a problem and then expect him to guess what it is.

Often the difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consists of leaving about three or four things a day unsaid. ―Harlan Miller

Use yesterday's paper, not today's, to wrap something.

Offer him a few suggestions, but not too many.

Unless he asks for help, leave him alone when he is fixing something.

Let him brag about you.

He may not always express himself clearly or even tactfully, but remember, in his eyes you're beautiful.

Buy him new underwear. Otherwise, he'll wear the ones he has until they fall off.

Fill a stocking for him at Christmas or map out a Valentine's Day treasure hunt where the surprise is you. He still likes surprises.

American women expect to find in their husbands a perfection that English women only hope to find in their butlers. ―W. Somerset Maugham

When you are out with him at a restaurant, don't say that you are not hungry, and then eat most of his food.

When you want him to volunteer, ask him first. Don't volunteer his time without his permission.

On a cold morning, scrape the ice off his car windshield.

Let him keep those same old raggedy pants that he wears every Saturday.

Keep his favorite candy hidden from the children.

Don't tell him everything that's in the newspaper before he reads it.

Learn to play or enjoy a sport with him.

Ask him if there is anything that he needs when you go to the store.

Nothing flatters a man as much as the happiness of his wife; he is always proud of himself as the source of it. ―Samuel Johnson

Record checks that you've written in the checkbook.

Send him a card at work just to say hello.

Never open his mail.

Don't remind him that he is losing his hair.

No matter how short the trip, go away with him without the children at least once a year.

Whatever he keeps in his 'junk drawer,' don't worry about it. Just be glad that it's not all over the house.

Spend a lot of time together doing activities you love to share and less energy arguing about how you are different.

Surprise him with two tickets to his favorite sporting event.

Don't take over his side of the bed when he gets up in the middle of the night to go the bathroom!

Don't over- analyze your marriage. That's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every twenty minutes to see how its roots are growing. ―Unknown

No matter how much you are tempted, let him discover on his own that the reason the lawnmower won't start is because he forgot to turn the 'on' switch.

Appreciate the small things that he does for you, but don't take the big things for granted.

Let him dream. A man's dreams can inspire him for a lifetime.

Help him protect his knees; after you drive his car, return the driver's seat to where he had it.

Keep your 'Honey do' list short.

Don't threaten the children with, 'Wait until your father gets home!'

Flirt with him once in awhile.

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each of you be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. ―Kahlil Gibran

Make Father's Day special for him.

When you encounter your friends, help him remember their names.

Get his car washed.

When you are wondering what he does with all those tools, remember, he may be wondering what you do with all that makeup.

Don't leave a wedding reception or a party without asking him to slow dance with you.

©2008. Robert J. Ackerman. All rights reserved. Reprinted from A Wife's Little Red Book. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, without the written permission of the publisher. Publisher: Health Communications, Inc., 3201 SW 15th Street, Deerfield Beach, FL 33442